Remember that this is likely stemming from your own insecurities and has nothing to do with the other person. She was abusive when I was a child and sees everything as a competition. we all have houses, good jobs, better attitude. The recognition and support I got from friends and family was so nice but I believe this made them even more Jealous of me Then I was left financially comfortable and then that made them hate me even further I was upset for awhile when this first happened and now I only feel PITY for them . I would never contact any of my sisters kids dads and have a belittling conversation. she lies about leaving and going to theater practice and when I call her out with all the right evidence she denies it makes up new shit. I wish I had confronted her there and then. Yesterday a 70lb Mirror almost fell on her. My only memories of my older sister by two years are of her constantly excluding me. I ask her the reason why she dislikes me so much and she … My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. They barely talk to me anyways. ... SCARING THE SH*T OUT OF MY SISTER - Duration: 14:00. i took off work early to spend time with her. I think it shows the reason why these people behave that way. In 14 months, not one single sign of interest. I like your advices. Especially when it got to our kids and started affecting us badly with their sarcastic belittling comments and kinda bullying, started keeping distance from them. I used to be super broke and homeless living on friends floors finally got a good job doing well formyself i drive a bmw now and my family is wishing on my downfall i get treated like shit by my own mom i dont wish this upon anyone. I remember when I was a kid we were really close and when she became a mum when I was 12, we remained so. Hello, Im a 14 year old girl and i live with my family of 4. they try to give me disease depression. Plus, they can cause a lot of unnecessary stress in your life. My sister is a very toxic family member and this explains her exactly. Since the maternal side of the family is woefully dysfunctional, I have cut all ties w/them. Hi. Understand how to perceive scheming family members now. I try do the best that I can. Im going to try and sum this up for you in little words as possible, to avoid boring family business. His sister was in the middle of everything and thinks I'm rich in reality she knows I fly there every year sacrificing my life for them while I'm struggling financially with not having a job there from not being a citizen! Lesson learned....Next trip I see them i wont be donating shit but maybe an hr of therapy for behavior modification! This was all an attempt to make me move. I also have aunts and uncles who are super jealous for really no reason other than to maintain their pride and greed. My sisters are all very much alike, work in the same field, and are of similar temperaments -- thus, I have often, over the years, felt excluded and hurt by them. Many parents place high expectations on their children, and it's especially difficult if one child lives up to those expectations while the other doesn't. They both work in factories at low paid jobs. What’s hurt the most is that they glorify what their friends are doing, but downplay the same thing I do. Jenna/Reshot. But I am getting tired. Well, just abusive in general, really. This is exactly what I already thought about this and I appreciate the advice and I am going to be prepared to keep positive and I will keep my mouth shut. But remember, you can only control your own actions. What you wrote resonates so much with my husband's family(his brothers and their wives). Always trying to get one up but it doesn't work because I can genuinely be happy for her. I literally found this by looking up why my sister was such a bitch, and she does everything yours does, and it pisses me off. They control their kids and thought they were going to controll my mom not happing.cant think what that word is. She was very embittered, she also took out her venom on me, a child. I have always been there for my sister through thick and thin as she has for me but it has changed so much, now when I ring her she spends ten minutes on the phone it use to be over an hour also she has stopped ringing me and stopped doing things with me. People whine and complain about their dysfunctional families but rarely take action. Since then, I've made many great friends that have been family more to me than all of my relatives combined. She was verbally and physically abusive. Yet in … Anytime I asked her can you please watch her I have to make a call or go to the bathroom. All of my life my siblings and cousins and aunts always said bad things about for no cause at all and hurt me all of my life. My mother was horribly critical of me—calling me bookish and dull, compared to my sister’s charm—and I always felt like an awkward and unwanted guest who couldn’t join in. In my opinion, blood is more jealous, too. This is a really good thing for me to know because my sister has been throwing things at me since she got sick. On my maternal side of the family, there is so much jealously. I do not understand--- WHY DOES SHE HATE ME SO MUCH ? any advice on this would be massively appreciated!! I feel bad for people who were abused because they end up developing personality issues, and they only make it worse for everyone else. She always is with her family not with my family and she always … Seems the comparison is primarily towards my oldest sil and her marriage or marital situation(s). ~:). So recently my Sis & Bro in law came to visit. I don't care what she does. I needed to read this article cause i use to feel guilty about myself and even feel guilty for limiting interaction with them. I have accepted that unless I become less, they will always treat me like less. All they do is gossip about my husband and I. But then just try to do what we do to success. Yes, she is unmarried and adopted a girl child. Dad is elderly, wants to be independent, and I know what i have to deal with when its all said and done. Do not fuel the fire for their gossip and negative talk. My brother got married like 7 months ago and my sister in law just does not like me or idk. Time does not dilute the poison in the heart, some people never change. Inspire of me knowing that they hate me I always say good things about anyway trying to live according how the Bible tells us how to live. Say why your sister don’t talk to you don’t understand why she is different at work and home sometimes she different to us I told her that’s did not like this she acts like I am not her sister at work . Discover unique things to do, places to eat, and sights to see in the best destinations around the world with Bring Me! She has tried to be due with a baby at our wedding, she yelled at me at work in front of everyone and so much more. But however they feel about me wont stop me from achieving my end goals. MY HUSBAND COUSIN & HIS FAMILY IGNORE OUR FAMILY & THEY IGNORE MY HUSBAND ALSO, BUT STILL IN ANY FAMILY EVENT THEY INVITE US TO SHOW THAT HOW MUCH SOCIAL THEY ARE, OTHERWISE THEY GO BY OUR SITE ON STREET LIKE STRANGERS. How would she know this. If one sibling gets engaged first, this can create some jealous feelings and a sense of rivalry. I wish that I had read this blog. Some time like maybe months later, while mil and the oldest sil were trying to be cordial and generally asked how things were going I enthusiastically mentioned that I was going to complete a second masters and the program I was enrolling in...they grew stone cold silent with sil glancing over at mil with an expression on her face that didn't reflect joy for me. Cant trust him at all or leave him alone in my home because of the sly things hes known to do. Sigh, I have strange "relatives". I snapped on her and told her you need to stop lying because I did help out and where were you? It can be easy to dwell on the jealousy and negative feelings surrounding it. I will pray for a better future. I was hoping that this time around me and my sisters would get a long my mother died of cancer about 12years ago it was hard all of us me and my sisters was starting to get a long any way my father got ill we was going to the hospital and on this day my older sister had a cold and couldn't come so my younger sister give me a lift home but when I was in the car and we was driving along she started say to me that I was ugly I want get anyone lots of men like my daughter and yes I bit and said to her that her daughter was a ugly cow all the lads want her for is that she like her legs up in the air I was very angry so now is back to how is was because its all jealousy so now when my father dies hope not for a long time I will move right out of Hertfordshire for good I will never ever be back. Out shopping again! My family doesn't make as much money as my relatives do, and they intend to keep it that way by not helping us in the worst of times When my dad was out of a job, his brother purposefully didn't let him know that his company was hiring. But my mom told my aunt I did nothing and was talking trash. They will not take no more, They have been up to somthing but not sure what. jealousy of this brother is extreme.. They are not encouraging, supportive or giving. I dont like them from years of metaling and one day I just stop communication and my hubb soon followed . This almost never happens for me. If we go to the city for a day or weekend, they will never know. One of the best articles I have ever read! Marriage can be especially difficult if you don't approve of your sibling's significant other or feel like that person is threatening your bond with them. she litterly was to me my own very own daughter in every way. This could cause some competition as to who gets married first, who has kids first, who buys a house first, etc. Dump their sorry asses. When my mom got into a major car accident, they refused to loan money when our family was at our all time low financially with medical bills and our house was being threatened. Why doesnt my half sister want to meet me? "Give me one more chance to keep you satisfied.". Here's how to connect your DNA to your family tree on Ancestry.com so you can learn how you're related to your DNA relatives and unlock more about your heritage. Every family seems to have that one person who is always trying to be the best. I would like to make a correction to my prior post, thanks for posting my comment. But I am thanking myself everyday that I made the decision! My husband will not speak up to her in my defense. Going through similar issues. However, I have also been on the other side, and for this very reason have limited boasting on social media, and in general. One day, me mother was sick and was taken to the hospital. This was affecting not only our family, but also our marriage. You got nothing but her telling my niece come downstairs I'm not going upstairs. It's hard to be the bigger person, but it will be better in the long run. I am just so upset. I kept asking questions and I had lots of doubts on whether my low social record with my relatives was because of myself not getting too much involved or was it really because I knew that jealousy was present among many of them? Thanks for this blog. What happened next indicates that there are some mental health issues. Hurt other family members..it can have life long effects on someone especially young children reason I distant myself from mine.. even wen they put others in danger and know it to.. that's absolutely not cool... and they call you names and drag you down or spread roomers about you that's just unacceptable. As a mother can I fix this? Extremely wierd and bitter. They are finacially strapped, so I kicked in extra $ to help make the trip funner. Complimented them on their makeup but immediately reminded them that you still hate them Have compassion for yourself and be patient. I guess, no matter how old we are, we expect our parents, above all others, to take pride in our accomplishments and have an interest in our lives. Over nothing I basically commented on fb have a great time during one of her getaways she got mad said how would you like it if I posted something on your fb when you were away? She has hurt both of my children emotionally and while they have moved forward she has even hurt my husband - her own son. Sometimes, these same jealous relatives may feel conflicted on the inside. 2. He was at the end of his life. I tried so hard to make the relationship work, but I started noticing that she too never acknowledged my accomplishments and wasn't supportive of my creative efforts. Learn how to find your family's coat of arms or how to create your own! There comes a time when saying 'no' is important. How can we get that type of money? There talking about everyone and once you leave them alone then, misery will defeat themselves. The problem is, my mom and sister live in the same city, so every time I visit one of them, I have to visit the other, and both will get angry if I don't visit one of them first or for longer. I don't even know what to do. Instead we all pinch in and he never fully pays for any takeout instead he makes up excuses and blamed us for ruining his day! My sister whenever I saw her would go on and on about my niece's wedding, never once asking me about my wedding plans. than another." If a family member isn't happy for you, they are worthless! She is hardly home like she is always with her parents or just not home. Great advice! My sis was single back then and so was he. We moved to inner-city Liverpool with him, but were soon burgled and what little we had was stolen. You do not want your goals or current events to be the main discussion at their dinner table. I did call them out on it but they both downplayed it. You also shouldn’t have to be overly humble and ashamed of your milestones so you don’t offend your family members. "Maybe I didn't hold you, all those lonely, lonely times.". They are one of the few people you've known your entire life, and you've shared every milestone together. Then, she would buy the same clothes, furniture, drapes and called me to tell me she was buying the same SUV, I was driving. I am not a psychologist, I have been jealous of people I don't know posting things on social media because they seem so much happier than me in those pics, and I can't help but feel like a failure in those cases. relationship.And i want also to share fraud that is going on to i hate it because i know the truth. Thank you. It's unfortunate but if anyone is in a situation where, despite your many well-intentioned and loving acts and the passage of a lot of time, you find that your relationships with your relatives or family members are not improving... do what the blog says above, love from afar, forgive and make peace with your heart with them. They were not so cordial all of a sudden. Figure out what's driving their jealousy and try and put yourself in their shoes. They did not separate because of financial ties and cultural loyalty. Therefore, when it comes down to jealousy from others, it's really usually nothing to do with you. I have issues like this. I think its because she works so hard to just survive. he song Always on My Mind used to play over and over when I was growing up, and when I heard it again recently, those words. I have no idea when things started to go downhill, I couldn't pin point it but downhill they have gone. I literally go into a panic attack. As for me, I am not especially close to him, our grandmother knew of his existence but chose to include only me and my sister in her will, so I don’t see why I need to give up my … The very same had expressed his feelings for my sis that he had never met. And she knows it. Its like they aren't facing reality and how its affecting everyone else! Maybe you're actually the one who is jealous of a relative. It's that I heard her lying to my aunt and saying I haven't come downstairs. He looked at my sister, saw the best parts we share, and loved us more for it. I haven’t spoken to my brother in … On the surface, I understand why people feel the need to label different types of siblings. It was really sad. I hope this comment helped someone like me, who has come on here this morning thinking about what have I done to get this treatment from my entire immediate family. Jealous family members can drain you emotionally and make you feel bad about yourself. But my other half sister… Follow. So now i have realized i am gonna have to forget about them and move on. We have one sister that passed before 1 year old. I came in wanting a life there and all they want to do is be in charge of it! The most jealous aunt was a loser who got pregnant at 16 & had her life consigned to domestic service to a wealthy family. She also tells me I can't do anything right. Thanks for this blog. She also will not invite me to her home, in fact I am not allowed to bring it up. I do not harbor resentment or jealousy, but my MIL always talks about her favorite Grand daughter, and while my daughter is a granddaughter as well, she does not acknowledge her. Very nice information for this chapter jealous family thanks. She has some deep rooted issues and it is best for us to no longer communicate. When I was a child and a teenager, I hated my little sister. it simply comes down that i love there daughter more than they do and spend a whole lot more time with her and her brothers than there parents, because of that i am back stabbed and banished from there children and there is nothing i can do about it! I used to enjoy their company but there have been so many instances of them exploding on me. wow so many comments I didn't realize so many suffer from the same thing I discovered is hounding me my whole life! I limit my interactions with them, as their abuse of alcohol gets to be old. Don’t waste time on family who doesn’t accept you and only wants to find fault, gossip and criticize. I now know what it is that makes them jealous and say not nice things so no guys stay with me or I get ahead in life. So hateful. They are not an urban legend or a strange delusion. I only tried to focus on myself in my prior years, that is the only way to overcome this. And the way that she said it was full of disdain. Through the wonders of modern technology, I have an idea of where you live. I can see that I am not the only one who has got issues relating to my family. My health started improving and I felt free and relieved. Rising flew to Denver to visit: “When I walked into my parents’ house, she was actually happy to see me.” Her sister apologized for having treated her so poorly. She comes home late and doesn't watch her child. Has anyone else been through similar? I always thought there would be a time to ask him, stupidly thinking he would be OK, even though it was obvious he was dying. My Sister has done nothing but put me down about everything from my appearance, to where I live, how I raise my kids, to the Man I married. They instantly switched to a dialect/language I don't understand, or speak. specially me since my mother decided to tell me how things might have happened. I am really hurt by this, I have asked her if I have done anything wrong but she says its all in my head. I started getting good grades in class and eventually managed to get a good rank in university. My little sister also runs back and talks my abusive ex things. Thus, much of my childhood was spent trying to put out fires between my parents, where my siblings and I bore the brunt of their criticisms, which they spewed out of their own pain. How should you handle your child's horrible significant other? I will permanently shut them out. I have a 2 yr old niece who touches everything. Jealous relatives tend to downplay your accomplishments by telling you that lots of people can do that. Life of Tom 390,224 views. Your family should be supportive of your goals and proud of your accomplishments. However, it's important to practice self-care to stay emotionally healthy. Even indicating they all of my neighbors likede. I have been abused, and I can assure you that people who are jealous are the ones usually abusing others, and at the same time have also in some way been abused. My dad is elderly, mom has passed, a year now. People can't use you then, they tend to never like you. It was really nice because we could discuss dresses and wedding stuff together, really go through it together. She did nothing. If your aunt or cousin is constantly calling out your flaws or saying negative things to you, this is a sign that they are jealous. I'm the baby bother of two older siblings,a brother 2 years older,and a sister 8 years older,they both have giving me grief all my life,i love both of my siblings too death,but i didn't choose to be born,my parents choose this,so it's unfair that they pick on me,i'm 54 and it's still a issue,my parents are dead and i'm so tired of it,i'm really thinking about disassociating myself from them permanently,and i truly love and admire my older brother and sister. Sadly I don’t have a relationship with her 2 adult children whom she dragged into this whole thing.its crazy! Why does my sister hate me? My Sister has been bullying me for quite some time, so I decided to confront her and what a mistake that was, she tore into my Husband, and every aspect of my life with him. Now I’m taking a step back and taking care of my own life. I feel that the best thing is to just keep my distance. It may take a few really good cries, writing unsent letters, talking it out with a trusted friend, therapist, or significant other, etc. Any can give advice? At first, it was flattering but then it became a little scary. That is why I would only tell her about it a few days before I leave. Luckily, it didn't work and the party continued. 0 0. My mother is the worst. What a good article to explain the sensitive subject like this that so many face. A toxic mother-in-law is a soul-sucking parasite that feeds on your misery. Around age 60 I noticed that my handwriting was getting smaller and I was writing faster. He hates that i am happy and behind my back slags me off. Here are some more tell-tale signs. i have never ever done anything to her, so i asked her why she was dong this to me and she said she couldn't tell me. He has told my mother that I am well off financially (not the case at all), so that he will reap the benefits from their will, etc.. Any and all good things in my life does not leave my household. They'll end convos that entail good news. Who’s the one being immature now? And don't let them build up either—you'll only start to resent this family member and the relationship will deteriorate. That was 4 years ago. he never want to ask for advice or take advice and blame us for not giving him advices of his failure. The song Always on My Mind used to play over and over when I was growing up, and when I heard it again recently, those words, "Maybe I didn't treat you quite as good as I should have", sung so smoothly by Elvis, hit me. Any advice is welcome. My sisters have never visited me in 20 years. People who are filled with envy get defensive quickly and don't like their "flaws" being pointed out. Any one can help me? As someone beaten down by the term “half-sister… You will never hear them laugh unless they're laughing AT YOU. And not only that, how can i work and save money when I can't even live in that house until we can afford our own! If I had to take time off from my program to care for my mother while my sister lays in her bed and does nothing… well, improving my relationship with sis would be the least of my concerns. Thank you for sharing this. There is nothing wrong with enjoying their company. She is still my sister. The bitterness eventually made her age fast & gave her an ugly appearance. Seeing your relatives should make you feel good and loved. I've met half of my family members are insecure damn, even their uncles they do cussing on me. ", I have a young daughter of my own now. However, in most cases, you will find that certain relatives who harbor jealousy will usually not invite you to their events. He is always all over me … Meeting my mother and having me – his only son – must have been such a release. For the last 10 years of his life he had been an alcoholic trying to escape a personal pain that I, in my early 20s and developing my own life, was not prepared to stop and understand. I have many stories but I'll stop there. Don't allow these people to affect your self-esteem and make you lose confidence. I need help cause both sisters have taken all my moms money. Daughters of absent fathers (whether through death, divorce, or emotional neglect) often make the same mistakes, causing themselves immense anguish. Believing that my sister is the most important because she is the oldest (just like my mother and father of their families), she was always allowed my sister extra privileges and given in to whatever she wants. If it comes up, she changes the subject. So, I live with my sister. Wow really ? If your child said their first word at the 16 months, theirs did at 12 months. Looking back, it was probably one of the happiest times of his life. And was it you watching the kids no. Okay so a couple months ago, since back in december, my father found out he had another daughter who just turned 16(March 31) anyways my point is everyone was shocked! I had to clean up make up cracked and thrown all over my room. Bledsoe says, "Sometimes families promote unhealthy competition between children. 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